Conversation Partners #6

     On our last meeting, Deo brought one of his friends, Ivonne, who is also from Rwanda.  We gave our introductions and the first question that Ivonne asked me was how many languages I spoke.  Just as I had to tell Deo when he asked me this, I told her that I was the typical American that only speaks English.  We had a good laugh, and this idea drove the rest of our conversation.

     Deo asked Ivonne how work was last night.  I quickly asked her what she did, and she told me that she was a desk assistant at the GrandMarc who worked the night shift.  She told Deo that she doesn't understand American college students because she lost count of the number of "drunk girls wearing barefoot" that were coming into the GrandMarc on a Wednesday.  She said that they do not know how lucky they are to have the opportunity to be getting an education here and then they go and do irresponsible things all of the time.  I told her that I agree but then explained to her that it was probably because it was the start of dead days.

     Our conversation then switched to how differently children are raised in America compared to Rwanda.  Deo and Ivonne said that they have noticed that upper and middle class families are typically stricter in the raising of their kids in America while the poorer families are typically stricter in Rwanda.  Deo said that in Rwanda, this is true because the richer families are so busy with work, so they just let their children fend for themselves.  I told him that the same thing could be said for the poorer families in America; the parents could be working so many jobs to try to pay the bills that they do not have much time for their children.  We thought it was interesting that these things are switched in each country.

     As we were finishing this thought, the small, elderly lady that works at the BLUU (Sorry, her name escapes me) came up and started to talk to Ivonne.  Apparently they are really good friends.  When the conversation ended, Ivonne immediately said, "That's another thing that's wrong here!  That sweet woman should not have to be working at the age of 82!"  She told me that in Rwanda, once you hit the age of 65 (it even used to be 55 a few years ago) you cannot be hired anywhere even if you want to work.  I thought that this was interesting but told her that as wrong as it is for elderly people to be working to try to make ends meet, that Rwandan idea would probably never float in America.

    We carried on talking about topics similar to this for a while; it was definitely our longest conversation yet.  Eventually I had to leave to go to a job interview, so Deo and I said our goodbyes.  We promised that we would get lunch together a couple times over the summer since I will be living here, so I am looking forward to that.  I am very fortunately to have had this opportunity to make a new friend.
    

Conversation Partners #5

     Ever since Deo and I started meeting, I have always meant to ask him about about food in Rwanda and what he thought about American food.  I finally got the perfect opportunity to do so in our meeting yesterday.  Deo called me and asked if we could meet at the BLUU because he was very hungry.  It took a while to find Deo because on the phone, he just kept telling me that he "was at the restaurant."  So thinking he was at the "restaurant," I first went to Chickfila.  After waiting there for a while, I called Deo back and realized at the BLUU.  In his defense, I guess the BLUU is in fact a restaurant, I have just never thought of it like that.

     I had already eaten lunch, so I grabbed a cup of water and followed Deo around as he got his food.  When my friends and I eat at the BLUU, we grab our plates, go to one specific line, and get some food.  The first observation that I made about Deo was that he did not do this.  He would start at the vegetarian line and walk through all of the lines and really think about what he wanted.  After he got all of his food, we sat down and began our conversation.

     Of course, the first thing I wanted to ask Deo was how long it took him to get accustomed to American food; his answer was quite amusing.  He told me that he still isn't used to the food here and that he really doesn't like it.  He said that in Rwanda, most of the food is baked and almost no oil is used in their cooking while in America, everything is cooked and covered in oil.

     We continued talking about this for a while until Deo realized that he really liked the rice that they were serving today, so he got up to get more.  At first, he took his plate which still had food on it with him to go get more.  I stopped him and told him that at restaurants like this, we have to go get a second, clean plate to go get more food.  He didn't quite understand why and thought it was wasteful, but he did it anyway.  Even I thought that this social norm was a little weird and wasteful when I learned about it as a kid.  Why do I have to go dirty another clean plate just to go get another piece of pizza?  I know it has to do with germs, but I still think it is a little silly. 

     Anyway, I got to finally learn what Deo thought about food here, and we had a great conversation about it.  I am looking forward to our last meeting later today!

Learning Experience #4

I relearned how to play the guitar this weekend.

It's not that I forgot how to play the instrument, I just forgot how to allow myself time to play.  For the past four years, guitar has been a very big part of my life.  Some people read or play video games to escape stressors and relax.  I have tried these and many other activities for leisure, but they have never been able to fill my needs.  Finally, I discovered the guitar.  I found myself being able to sit down and lose myself in the fretboard for hours instead of the five to ten minutes that I was able to read a book. 

Up until this semester, I was always willing and able to adjust my schedule to allow for this special time.  Whether I stayed up an hour later than I typically would or decided to wing a biology lab quiz, I understood the benefits of this alone time and made these sacrifices.  Unfortunately, in my attempt to take 17 hours this semester, I forgot to allow myself this time.  Each day, I would walk into my room and see my guitars on their stands and think to myself, "If only I had time." It had been so long.  I had not even had time to find new songs that I was interested in learning.

Finally, this past Sunday, I decided to make room.  I am a big Washington Wizards fan, so I was sitting in our living room watching the game on mute while filling out flashcards for my organic chemistry lab final.  At the half, I turned the TV off and really started to focus on these flashcards.  Then I thought to myself: if these professional athletes get a break, maybe I deserve one, too.  I went in my room, grabbed my guitar and tuner, and moved the flashcards off of the table.  It had been so long that my nice guitar, which can go several hours of playing while staying perfectly in tune, was a whole step (2 frets) flat.  I eventually got it sounding nice again and began picking.  The first thing that I noticed was that the calluses on my finger tips that develop after months of playing were completely gone; it felt as if my fingers had never touched the strings before.

I played for a while and then turned the TV back on because I thought that halftime would be over.  To my surprise, there were 2 minutes left in the third quarter.  I was finally able to lose myself in something again.  It felt so reinvigorating.

Uncontrollable Laughter #2

     I have a religion night class.  I hate night classes.  Fortunately, the professor is really laid back and the class is full of funny people.  Also, because it starts at 5:30, many students bring food with them to hold them over until a ridiculously late dinner.  This past week, one student, let's name him Josh, brought a banana in for his class.  Josh has also had the professor in some of the other classes that she teaches, so he in particular feels comfortable joking with the professor.  Upon finishing the banana, Josh thought it would be funny to attempt to throw the peel in the trash can.  As you can probably guess, he missed terribly.  What was funny about his miss was that it landed on the overhead projector in the corner of the room.  Also, the professor did not notice because she was focused on the lecture.  Josh crawled on his hands and knees up to the projector, reached up, grabbed the banana, and dropped it in the trashcan all without the professor noticing.  At this point, the entire class was laughing and the professor was so confused.

     The funniest part for me was that the professor never learned why the entire class suddenly burst into laughter.  Somehow the class kept it together and never spilled the beans.  She kept asking over and over again over the course of a few minutes.  After 5 minutes, the class finally calmed down enough to continue with the lecture.  I am just really glad the professor did not offer extra credit for anyone to tell her what was going on; that would have made for a much less exciting story.

 

Learning Experience #3

     I am a chronic procrastinator.  For some unknown reason, procrastinating has always worked for me.  I am not saying that I can sit down the night before an exam and be stress-free while looking over my notes- I am usually stressed to the max.  However, I am able to use this stress as motivation to study.  This works, but I know it isn't efficient or healthy for me.

     This is always the dilemma for me: it is hard for me to just casually do work because I need stress for motivation, but the stress is beginning to take its toll on me.  Recently, with the help of this class, it has been my goal to break this habit. The main reason I started this goal was because it would be impossible and incorrect to do 12 blog posts and 10 comments in a single night.  Because of this, I have forced myself to evenly distribute the posts throughout the semester.  Also, it would not be interesting to see my blog posts, which are supposed to be a representation of my growth throughout the semester, all clumped together in the last week of the semester.

     So how has this been working for me?  Well, I'm not going to lie, it was extremely difficult at first.  I would come up with excuses such as "well... I have a big test this week so there's no way I can do a post."  Eventually, I began to make progress.  The biggest thing that helped me break the cycle of procrastination was looking forward to finals week.  If I left a lot of my work in this class for that week along with 6 final exams, I would fail miserably.  I began to see it as the sooner I finish these things, the more time I'll have to study for my two big organic chemistry finals.

     All in all, I think I have taken a large dent out of my procrastination habit.  Last week, I even began to make study guides and note cards for my other exams (something that I usually wait until dead days to do).  I hope I can keep myself focused on this goal of mine. I have noticed that it leaves me more time to have fun, so I plan to use this as my motivation in the future.

Funny Situations

Learning Experience #2

     This past weekend, I went to New Orleans. Needless to say, I learned a lot on the trip. The first thing I learned is that I should no longer let a long drive keep me from going somewhere. I have passed up several opportunities to go on trips simply because I didn't want to drive too far away. Luckily on this trip, I was forced to put up with the drive. To my surprise, minus the idiot drivers in Baton Rouge, the drive wasn't too bad. Even if it was a pain, I would have been extremely disappointed if I missed out on the trip because of it.

     The next thing I learned on my trip is that there are certain times where I need to stop worrying about how much money I am spending and just concentrate on having fun. Yes, I went over the budget that I allowed myself, but I wouldn't have had half the fun if I was constantly worrying about this. On past vacations, I've spent a lot of time worrying about my budget, and now I feel like it really held me back from making the best of my trip. Trips like this are typically a rare thing for me, so I can justify splurging like this a couple times a year.

     The last major thing that I learned on this trip is to never let preconceptions from keeping me from trying something new. I went to Felix's, a famous oyster bar, and was physically forced to try a raw oyster. I'm not here to say that I loved it, but I did love the experience. My trip also included me doing something else that I never thought I would do. I won't say what it was on here, but I will say that it was completely legal, and I now have a small, permanent souvenir to commemorate the best trip of my life.

Conversation Partners #4

     Deo and I met again last Tuesday. This was a very important day for him (and all other Rwandas) because it was the twentieth anniversary of the start of the Rwandan Genocide. We began talking about our school work and Deo was worried because of how busy he was. He had two essays that were due the next day and he had to speak at TCU's commemoration that night. On top of this, he explained that this week is always a very hard and emotional week for him because he lost many family members in the genocide. This was the first time that Deo really opened up to me. It felt good to see how far we had come as friends and to see that Deo felt comfortable sharing such personal details with me, but I couldn't help but feel really bad for him. In Rwanda, everything is closed on this day, and here's Deo stressed out of his mind with schoolwork and trying to cope with the loss of loved ones. This just made me think of how often this must happen and how certain national holidays should be recognized out of respect for other cultures.

      After talking about this for a while, Deo told me that he recently bought his first laptop. He told me this because he was very confused once he opened it and realized that it didn't come with any software like Word. I told him that you have to buy that separately and he looked very confused. He didn't understand why he would have to make another purchase simply to write papers. This was another stressor that was really putting Deo down. However, this time I was able to help. My dad's office is constantly going through computers, so they have tons of access codes for Microsoft Office laying around. I called him and he said that he could get one for him within a week. Until then, I showed him Google Docs and gave him a quick tutorial. It felt good to be able to lift a little bit of weight off of Deo's shoulders. We said our goodbyes, and I let Deo get back to his busy schedule.

Conversation Partners #3

     After a long break from meeting with Deo due to spring break and busy test schedules, we were finally able to meet this past week. The meeting started out with a few laughs because Deo asked me to take a look at his phone to see if I could figure out what was wrong with it. Upon being handed the phone, I realized that he still had the original plastic wrap on the screen with the company name on it. He told me that he thought that he wasn't able to remove it and was very glad that he could now see his full screen.
     We then began to talk about doing FASFA for the upcoming school year. Deo really began to open up for the first time when I asked him if they have something similar in Rwanda. He told me that they didn't, but he also told me that paying for school is done much differently. He explained that if a family feels that their child is smart, they gather the entire extended family and tell them that they are sending their child to school. The extended family then takes the all of the expenses, including supplies, food, uniforms, and tutors, and splits it up among the different families. In return for the help, the family does the same for any of their relatives that want to go to school. Deo told me that he currently sends about $200 a month to Africa for cousins, nieces, and nephews. It was cool to learn just how family oriented their culture is. I am willing to bet that 75% of my extended family doesn't even know what year of college I am in. We kept talking about this and I told him about graduation presents (which is the only thing remotely similar in America to what he was telling me). He thought that this was weird and wasteful and the money should be given at the beginning of college to help pay for the actual schooling instead of having fun.
     As we were walking out of the IEP building, Deo got a call from a friend who is also from Rwanda that goes to TCU. As soon as he answered the phone, he switched from having a conversation in English with me to having a conversation in Swahili with her. I found this remarkable, and it didn't stop here. He finished the conversation with her and then ran into someone he knew and began to have a conversation with her in French. I was in awe. He was able to switch between 3 languages flawlessly. The lady whom he was talking to in French apparently asked me something and Deo had to tell her that I only speak English. I was just so impressed because Deo only had told me that he spoke French. I look forward to seeing what other talents Deo has been hiding from me the next time we meet.

Learning Experience #1

     I have put off doing one of these for a long time because I always feel like I am not learning anything relevant to write about. Yes, I can write about how I have learned about cellular transport or memorized a chemical reaction named after some French guy, but I feel like that stuff doesn't really matter in the grand scheme of things. One thing that I have learned recently (or rather finally realized) is just how lucky I am to have amazing professors in my major classes. I realized this when my friend Brad showed me some of his material for his MCAT prep course. I was skimming through when I realized that thanks to the dedication and hard work of my professors, I knew almost every topic- and well. This would not be possible if I had unmotivated professors like some of my friends that go to different universities. I feel so lucky to have this to my advantage.
     A more lighthearted topic that I recently learned about in my behavioral research class is just how much companies manipulate statistics and studies to lie to customers. I've always noticed that every toothpaste brand is recommended by 9 out of 10 dentists, but I never really thought about this. The companies that we trust to provide us with quality products are just overpaying some statistician to manipulate studies and bend the results to make their product seem better than it is. If you ever get a free moment, I recommend reading How to Lie With Statistics. It is a quick read (about 100 pages with pictures) and you can download the pdf for free here https://archive.org/details/HowToLieWithStatistics.
     Now that I realized how much relevant information I actually learn on a regular basis, I look forward to writing my next learning experience post.

Converastion Partner #2

     As promised in our last encounter, I brought one of my Frisbees for Deo to see. I thought that he would recognize that he actually knew what a Frisbee was but he just did not know the name for it, but he actually had never seen one before.  I handed it over for him to inspect and he immediately figured out how it was used.  This impressed me because when I am handed a foreign object, I often do not automatically know what to do with it.  We threw the Frisbee for several minutes and he began to ask what games you can play with a Frisbee.  I explained the basic rules of Frisbee golf and ultimate Frisbee, but he did not seem to understand.  Afterwards, we walked to Union Grounds to get something to drink.
     On the way to Union Grounds, Deo asked more about the buildings of TCU and how each department is divided into its respective buildings.  He was especially interested in the business school since that is what he plans to do after IEP.  This brought me back to thinking of how determined and focused Deo is on reaching his goals (this meeting, he told me that one of these goals is to own a Range Rover because he is "tired of driving his taxi car around").  In a stroke of luck, as we made it to the commons, some members of the TCU's Ultimate Frisbee team were playing a pick-up game and Deo and I watched for a while.  He jokingly told me that it was just a ripoff of soccer and we had a good laugh.
     When we got to Union Grounds, I bought Deo's drink due to my abundance of campus cash.  I haven't seen anyone so appreciative in a very long time.  It's funny to think that TCU gives up this campus cash (I mean... we pay for it in our meal plans...) and we take it for granted and think of it as fake money to buy whatever we want.  It meant nothing to me to swipe my I.D. for a Sprite, but Deo appreciated that Sprite as if it were the last one on Earth.  I hope this moment sticks with me forever and I never forget how lucky I am.

Uncontrollable Laughter #1

     Today, in organic chemistry, I felt uncontrollable laughter for the first time in a long time.  Dr. Montchamp, our professor, was attempting to show us why this specific carbene would not react with a base.  The reason behind this was that the carbene's molecular orbitals were sterically hindered.  Dr. Montchamp attempted to draw these orbitals, but upon its completion, it seemed as if he had drawn male genitalia on the bored.  Nobody wanted to be the first person to laugh.  Unfortunately, Brad, my friend who sits next to me, could not control his immaturity and began to giggle.  It had been long enough before he started laughing that the rest of the class had already moved on and gotten over the drawing silently.  So of course, Brad was the lone giggler- however, this was not the case for long.  This was due to Brad laughing SO HARD that his glasses came unscrewed and the lens fell out.  I could no longer hold back my laughter.  So as Brad and I are laughing so hard that we can't breathe, my friend who sits on the other side of me, Elli, attempted to take a picture of the board because the next reaction was too difficult to draw.  However, Elli forgot to turn the flash of her camera off.  Dr. Montchamp looked up, and at this point, all three of us were dying from everything happening in such a short amount of time.  Dr. Montchamp just shook his head and after a few minutes, all was calm.

     Obviously in this case, the uncontrollable laughter was a distracting agent.  Brad first distracted me and our laughter distracted Elli.  By the point that all three of us were laughing, we were also distracting everyone within a three row radius of us.  Distraction is often looked at as a con of laughter, but I don't think it was necessarily a bad thing here.  On top of it being an extremely stressful environment, I had a terrible morning and this helped turned that around.  While we were distracting, the only thing going on at the time was copying drawings off of the board, so I do not think we hindered anyone's learning; in fact, I would like to think that we made someone's day better with our laughter.

Conversation Partner Reflection One

     My conversation partner is Deo Mahanga and he is from Rwanda.  Deo and I met at the IEP center because he told me he only knows "IEP and Lupton-BLUU."  We introduced ourselves with a very awkward handshake- he told me that he is still working on his "greeting skills."  We asked each other basic information to break the ice.  I learned that Deo is 34 years old, has a wife and two children, previously lived in Oregon, and works as a cab driver on the weekend.  As he finished telling me this, the lady who was in charge of pairing us together walked by.  Deo stopped her and asked why we are doing this and what is required of him because he was confused about the whole program.  After hearing that this is designed to help develop his conversation skills, Deo seemed excited and really began to open up.

     Since it was so nice outside and Deo is so unfamiliar with the campus, I decided that we should have the remainder of our meeting while walking around.  As soon as we left the building, we ran into a tour group.  Deo was very curious about the purpose of this group.  He did not understand why students were visiting and, even more so, why there parents were with them.  I guess all of his schooling has been by his own will and independent of his parents.  Either way, we continued on with our own tour.

     As most males do, Deo and I began to talk about sports.  We shared the ability to watch and enjoy any sporting event, but I wanted to know what his favorites were.  He couldn't really decide, but he picked basketball and soccer.  I told him that I like baseball and college football, but I also told him that I play a lot of ultimate Frisbee.  He looked very confused and told me that he did not know what a Frisbee was, so I promised to bring one to our next meeting.  The remainder of our tour was him asking questions about the dorm and stopping mid-sentence to make sure he was using certain words correctly.  I really admire how committed he is to learning English and how seriously he took our conversation.  I look forward to our next meeting.

Jokes for 2/12

"A man died and was taken to his place of eternal torment by the devil.
As he passed sulphurous pits and shrieking sinners, he saw a man he recognized as a lawyer snuggling up to a beautiful woman.
'That's unfair!' he cried. 'I have to roast for all eternity, and that lawyer gets to spend it with a beautiful woman.'
'Shut up,' barked the devil, jabbing the man with his pitchfork. 'Who are you to question that woman's punishment?'"

"I just read a book about Stockholm Syndrome. It was pretty bad at first, but by the end I kinda liked it."

"There are 2 types of people in the world. Those that can extrapolate from incomplete data"

"Freudian slip: when you say one thing, but you mean your mother."

"Have you heard about the corduroy pillow?

I hear it's making headlines."

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=qnydFmqHuVo

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z-BbpaNXbxg

What is Laughter?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MFM4VE20P2E

What are Literature and Civilization?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7kaQj8XrtYw&feature=youtu.be